How To Survive Father’s Day

Father’s Day, it’s the holiday where children pretend they have a parent who is not-Mom that is thoroughly engaged and supportive. For dads, it’s the day when shoddy hand made tie racks, alcohol, and harsh reality meet. It’s a time when coping mechanisms are tested and the question arises, “Can you beat your all-time record for faking it?”

Faking it on Father’s Day takes many forms. Children need to pretend dad isn’t judging them, and dads need to pretend the kids aren’t holding a grudge because of the dreaded fifth-grade incident when their ice cream dropped out of their cone and you wouldn’t buy another one because “That’s just the way how life works.”

If you’re going to see your dad on his special day here are some tips on how to survive it without having a flashback to that disappointing fifth-grade trip for ice cream.

• Alcohol is your friend. Please use in moderation. Remember, what you are trying to do is put a shiny gloss on whatever pleasant memories you have of your childhood. Too many Captain Morgan and Cokes will dredge up unwanted feelings and emergency sessions with your psychologist.
• Funny Father’s Day cards. Hide your true emotions with humor! Pick out that Hallmark card that says, “Look at this silly puppy” without having to say, “I love you.”
• Quick visits are the best visits…